Big Family Mom Overwhelm


Sometimes when it rains it pours.  For a big family moms this can look like their own special brand of overwhelm. No wonder. For the stay at home big family mom with 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 or more children there are many more interactions, stimulations and decisions to make on any given day. Between nursing the baby, keeping the toddler alive, breaking up a fight, giving instructions, reminding 5 people twice, managing breakfast, lunch, and dinner while considering special nutritional requirements, doing the groceries, cleaning, giving consequences, teaching life skills, building character, paying bills, sticking to budgets, managing appointments, rides, phone calls, extended family drama, clean up (again) big family stay at home moms have their work cut out for them. Heaven help her if there is homeschool on top of everything else.

So what’s a girl to do when the overwhelm starts to really drag her down? When her brain is on overload, her nerves are frayed and emotions are a rollercoaster?

One thing is to recognize that even Christians get overwhelmed and that’s ok.  Though situations vary, one common aspect of overwhelm is decision fatigue. Overwhelmed by too much stimulus can lead to a freeze response just to cope.  With so many plates to juggle and choices to make in a day with lots of littles and an entire home to manage this is understandable.

So some grace rather than guilt goes a long way when experiencing overwhelm.

Next I recommend slowing down and simplifying things.

SLOW DOWN

Be still, and know that I am God. (Ps 46:10) What does slowing down look like for you? For me, it’s intentionally prioritizing beginning the day by reading my Bible and praying. My husband and started a 2 year Bible reading commitment last year to help us be accountable and grow in this grace. Bonus: we get to share our thoughts and comments in the Bible app with one another.

I carry this slowing down into the day by pausing at each meal to take deep breaths and focus my mind on Christ.  With each breath inhale I focus on the reality of His presence in me. With each exhale I release tension in my body and stress from my soul.  ‘cast all my anxiety upon Him because He cares for me” (1 Peter 5:7)

SIMPLIFY

I have a simplification process called ‘Triage’ that helps me go from overwhelming choices to clarity.  One a piece of paper I list out all the things I think I have to do in any order. Then I go back over them and itemize them as

1 - Critical (people will die unless this gets top priority)

2 - Urgent (manageable if this waits on the backburner for a time)

3 - Non-Urgent (this could wait a long time and life would go on)

 

This helps me see what I can cut out of my life, schedule, even out of my head & heart if there are relationships that are unhealthy & draining me of emotional bandwidth during a season when I would be wise to conserve my energy.

If mom goes down because she gets crushed under the weight of overwhelm everyone will be impacted.  God will make a way, He always does. At the same time, when there are warning lights flashing on the dash it’s wisdom to pull over and prioritize before something breaks. So if you are feeling the weight of overwhelm know that there is a way out. You got this mom – and He’s got you.

__________________

 

If this blog blessed you feel free to join my Big Family Moms community where I have lots more resources and encouragement for moms like you overcoming struggles and growing in grace. Here's the LINK if you like.

 

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